


Painful Realizations

by UniverseInk



Category: Batman - All Media Types
Genre: Batfamily (DCU), Bruce Wayne is a Good Parent, Don't copy to another site, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Past Rape/Non-con, list of trigger warnings in notes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-07
Updated: 2020-07-07
Packaged: 2021-03-05 05:35:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,563
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25119238
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/UniverseInk/pseuds/UniverseInk
Summary: It's a calm afternoon at Wayne Manor, right up until Jason's rant about his classmate causes Dick to realize something about his past
Comments: 23
Kudos: 378





	Painful Realizations

**Author's Note:**

> TWs: Discussions of past rape; dissociation; sexual violence is discussed in some detail, but not depicted; mentions of rape apologism (not from anyone in the batfam)
> 
> All of the assaults referenced in this are canon to at least one iteration of the comics

If you had told Dick a few years ago that one day his family would be able to consistently spend time together without attempted murder, he would have said you had a shitty sense of humor. Now, though, he’s more than happy with the way things turned out.

It’s still hard to get them all in one place at the same time, but that has more to do with vigilantism being a time-consuming job than outright resentment. It’s been a long road, full of twists and bumps, but it’s worth it for nights like this.

Bruce and Damian are playing chess in one corner of the sitting room. Cass is sitting cross-legged in an armchair, braiding Tim’s hair while he sits on the floor, typing at his laptop. Duke is sitting on the other end of the couch from Dick, glaring halfheartedly at the textbook in his lap. Jason is sprawled out on the window seat, ranting about some jackass in one of his classes. 

The rest of them are only half-listening. Ever since Jason decided to go to college, he’s been full of stories about the privileged assholes in his classes. His rants are more about letting off steam than getting any sort of feedback, so he doesn’t really care about audience participation as long as no one tells him to shut up.

“And _then_ ,” Jason snarls, gesturing violently in the general direction of the ceiling. “The fucker has the audacity to say that the story isn’t even about rape at all! He literally said it couldn’t be rape because she said yes, even though the guy was impersonating her boyfriend! Like jesus fucking christ, it’s not consent since she didn’t know who she was having sex with! And then he tried to say he was just playing the devil’s advocate, which—”

“Hang on,” Dick cuts in. “What you said about it not being consent cause she didn’t know he wasn’t her boyfriend, what do you mean?”

“Uh,” Jason blinks, thrown off by the interruption. “The story was a horror piece about this girl who was being stalked by one of those friendzone assholes who was pissed that she was dating someone else. It turned out the guy had shapeshifting powers, and he used them to impersonate her boyfriend. The morning after, he bragged about tricking her into sleeping with him.” Jason huffs angrily. “So she said yes when she _thought_ it was her boyfriend, but she never would have said yes if she’d known. It doesn’t count as consent when the thing she consented to isn’t what happened.”

“Oh,” Dick frowns at his lap. “I guess I never thought about it like that.”

It’s not that Dick doesn’t think Jason’s right, it’s just… Swap around the genders, and that story might as well be describing what happened between him and Mirage. And if what happened in the story was— 

That can’t be right, he wasn’t… But if it is, then what about Catalina? Was that—

“Dick?” Jason asks, concern lacing his voice. “You okay?”

“Yeah, uh…” Dick fumbles for words. He’s not quite present, the sounds in the room filtered through static, like an old radio. “Just realized something, is all.” 

Someone kneels in front of Dick, and he looks up to see Bruce’s face. He looks back down, not ready to deal with the knowing look in his eyes. 

“What’s going on, Dick?” Bruce says it softly, in that gentle tone of voice reserved for victims. 

Dick opens his mouth to reply, but is cut off by a sob. He pitches forward, collapsing onto Bruce, who pulls him into a tight hug. He sobs into Bruce’s shoulder, his whole world narrowed down to his tears soaking into his dad’s sweater, and the soft reassurances being muttered in his ear.

He pulls back once his tears have run their course. He wipes at his eyes and glances around the room, his breath catching when he realizes his siblings all watched that go down. 

“Shit,” he mutters, sitting upright and rubbing at his face. “I—”

“It’s okay,” Bruce says, voice low and calm. “No one’s judging you for this.”

Dick isn’t sure if he’s talking about the breakdown or what he inadvertently admitted. In a family of detectives, it’s too much to hope that none of them caught on. 

“Want us to give you some space?” Jason asks. His voice is pinched, and Dick can’t bring himself to look up. He nods. “Okay, we’ll go.”

Bruce moves as if to stand, but Dick grabs his wrist. “Not you,” he croaks.

“Alright, I’ll stay.” He settles down onto the couch beside Dick. 

Jason leans over, telegraphing his movements, and pulls Dick into a hug. “Sorry about this, Dickiebird.”

Dick shakes his head, returning the hug. “Not your fault, Little Wing.”

Cass studies him briefly, head tilted to the side. “It is going to be okay,” she says, in a matter-of-fact tone that Dick can’t help but believe, just a little. He nods, giving her a weak smile, then does the same to Tim and Duke, hovering by the doorway. 

They leave, and it’s only Dick, Bruce, and Damian left. Damian crosses the room, hesitating once he gets to the couch. 

“Richard…” His mouth is pressed into a thin line. It’s an expression Dick knows well, one that means Damian isn’t sure how to help. He opens his arms, and Damain crawls into his lap, wrapping his arms around Dick’s neck. 

“You are the best partner I’ve ever had,” he says. It’s stilted, and awkward, but Dick knows he means every word. “This does not change that.”

“Thanks, Dami.” Dick hugs him tighter, then lets him pull away.

Damian stands and turns to Bruce. “I’m trusting you to look after him.”

“I will,” Bruce says. Damian gives him a serious nod and leaves the room.

“He really cares about you, huh?” Bruce muses.

“Yeah, he’s a good kid.” Dick sighs, settling back into the couch and drawing his knees to his chest.

“Do you want to talk about it?” 

Dick shrugs. “I didn’t realize,” he says. “That story, what Jason was talking about…” He breaks off, swallowing hard.

Bruce wraps an arm around his shoulders, pulling him close. “Take your time.”

“When I was leading the Titans, a woman called Mirage traveled back in time to stop some stuff, it’s a long story. We were… together, in her future.” Dick hugs his shins. “She kidnapped Kori and impersonated her. I didn’t know until Kori escaped, and by then we’d… you know.”

“I know what you mean.”

“Yeah. Mirage blurted it out in front of the whole team, too. Me and Kori fell apart after that. I couldn’t be with her without worrying that it wasn’t really _her_. We couldn’t get past that.”

“I’m sorry that happened to you,” Bruce says.

“That’s not all, though,” Dick blurts out. He’s said this much, might as well spill everything. “You remember Blockbuster?”

“He targeted you when you were working in Bludhaven. I remember you tried to take the blame when your protege killed him.”

“Yeah, Tarantula.” Dick nods. “Her name was Catalina. She had a thing for me, tricked Babs into thinking I had cheated on her so we’d break up, but I never thought of her that way.

“After she killed Blockbuster… I was in shock, I guess.” Dick presses his chin against his knees. “I couldn’t really move, or talk much. We were on a roof, and she got on top of me.” Dick curls in on himself, hiding his face against his thighs. “I told her to stop.”

Bruce pulls Dick against his chest, rubbing slow circles on his back. “I’m so sorry.”

“How—” Dick gasps. “How did I not realize? That it was—” A dry sob wracks his body. “God, I can’t even say it.”

“It’s okay, Dick.” Bruce holds him tight, speaking into his hair. “You didn’t realize because it was too painful to handle. With all the shame and stigma around being a survivor, especially for men, it’s not hard to understand why you wouldn’t want to accept it.”

“But we deal with this all the time!”

“It’s different when it’s someone else. Believe me, Dick, I know what you’re going through.”

Dick pulls away, blinking up at Bruce’s earnest expression. “You do?”

“Yes.” Bruce’s face is open, honest in a way it very rarely is. “The night Damain was conceived, Talia spiked my drink.”

Dick’s mouth falls open in horror. “Oh god…”

“It wasn’t until I met Damian that I really let myself realize that I wasn’t okay with what happened that night. And it was even longer before I could admit that Talia had raped me.”

“Does he know?” Dick whispers.

Bruce looks down at the rug. “When Talia brought him to me, when she reminded me of that night… I was angry, I yelled that she had drugged me. He was right there.”

“Shit, B.” Dick pulls him into a hug. “I’m sorry.”

“Thanks, chum.” Bruce rests his chin on Dick’s head. “I wish I could just fix this for you, but I can’t, and it’s not going to be easy. You can _always_ come to me, if you need to talk. And if you want to see someone in a more professional capacity, Dinah’s very understanding.”

Dick nods into Bruce’s sweater. “Thank you, dad.”

“You’re welcome, Dick.”

**Author's Note:**

> Reading about what Mirage did to Dick played a big part in my ability to recognize and name what happened to me. I really wish DC would acknowledge that Dick and Bruce are both survivors and let them work through that, but I don't exactly have my hopes up
> 
> If you're recovering from sexual violence and need help, I highly recommend [RAINN.org](https://rainn.org/). They have phone and chat hotlines, and I've found them very helpful. They also have resources on their website. And if you're wondering if your experiences are valid, I assure you that they are
> 
> You can find me on tumblr @merc--ury (main) or @transrobins (Batfam/DC blog)
> 
> Please leave a comment or kudos if you liked this


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